Hey warriors. I wanted to share a recent experience of heartbreak with you and my experience going through those intense emotions. I discovered recently that my romantic interest was more interested in my best friend. This realization caused me to lose control of my emotions for an evening and really brought out some very dark emotions I thought I had mastered. I am much better now, but the experience was really shocking.

When we are experiencing intense emotion we cannot think rationally

The key thing to remember when we are experiencing intense emotions like anxiety, grief, jealousy, anger etc is that our thinking rational side is sitting on the bench where our emotional mind is making all the plays. When we get really emotional we may say things we don’t mean, much like how drugs affect our normal behavior. If you are experiencing an intense wave of emotion there is nothing wrong with having a designated thinker next to you to help guide you through the experience. Emotions are extremely powerful and can affect all humans no matter how big and tough they appear.

Intense emotions can make us revert to a childlike state

During my experience with the grief, anxiety and anger with dealing with losing a love interest, I was really surprised at how childlike my thinking became. There was a very deep part of me that was screaming “It isn’t fair!!! She should want me not him!”. At the time, this line of “thinking” seemed very rational, but after I gave myself time to calm down I began to realize that the entire situation was outside my control. We can’t make anyone love us. And if someone doesn’t love us, there will be thousands we will meet later in life that will fill that void the heartbreak left.

Overdosing on emotions is easy without awareness

My recent experience left me both proud but also disappointed that I lost control over my emotional side. Fortunately I was alone in my grief so I could avoid the embarrassment from the things I said to myself, but I knew I let the situation gain too much power in my mind. Once I realized I was losing control I began to focus on my breathing and using my anxiety recovery skills to get me back to center. What seemed like a massive wound at the time is now more of an annoying mosquito bite.

Even in your worst moments, you have people who love you and are cheering for your success

Anxiety is hard. Heartbreak is hard. Both of these emotions are just a part of us, not our entire being. It is easy to feel like our loved ones don’t really care about us or that everyone would be better off if we weren’t around during our dark moments. The imagery that these dark emotions create are just an illusion. Once rationality and logic can return and be fixed firmly in the driver seat, we can begin to understand and appreciate how fortunate we are to experience love at all in this life.

If you are struggling reach out! I am always available to listen to you and would love to hear your story.

Keep growing warriors!